Rogue Male: A Hitler Story

By J. Waltman

Generally, when the movie description alludes to an assassination attempt on the life of Adolf Hitler, I figure there will be a ton of action. Sadly – for myself and the group – this proved to not be the case. We spent the majority of the run time trying to pay attention to this film, which was proving to be a Herculean task. To date this is the first film we have come close to giving up on and turning off, and we watched The Greasy Strangler. Though, I was pleased to find out that the amount of knowledge I had regarding the second world war would actually come in handy. I guess it’s helpful I know more about the war and Hitler than I do my own grandfather (who incidentally fought in said war). But I suppose I should just get to it.

Since this BBC television piece was based on a book of the same name published in 1939, I needed to do a little research on source material. Evidently the sporting protagonist in the book is unnamed, as is the unnamed dictator in the unnamed country he is hunting. The author Geoffrey Household is quoted in an interview as saying that he “always imagined the dictator to be Hitler, but he left it open so you could pick either Hitler or Stalin”. Apparently we were lucky enough to have the producer Mark Shivas choose Hitler and produce one of the most uninteresting piles of garbage I’ve ever had the misfortune of viewing (and I’ve seen Bloodrayne). Ultimately this was to be the start of a series of six TV films about our protagonist, and they only ended up with three, mercifully.

The film takes place in the pre-war Germany and England of 1939, where Hitler had already become Chancellor and was forming Germany and Eastern Europe to fit his Aryan image. Within the first 3 minutes of the film a group of German hunters has decimated a group of game birds. We are then introduced to our protagonist Sir Robert (Hunter) Thorndyke played by Peter O’Toole, as he stalks his way through the woods. We come to find that he is not out there hunting birds, but he is out there hunting the most dangerous game, Hitler!

After lining up his shot and being foiled by an injured bird and an SS officer, Sir Thorndyke is taken to the Nazi chateau and subsequently tortured by the Gestapo. Here we are treated to some fascinating acting choices by O’Toole while tied to a chair and bloodied almost beyond recognition. The faces he pulls are reminiscent of Willem Dafoe in literally any role he has ever played. Since it was his own personal mission to come for Hitler in this manner (i.e. he is not a spy sent by the crown) he is up shit creek without a paddle.

For some reason the SS officer and Gestapo need to stage his inevitable death to look like a hunting accident, so they settle on throwing him off of a cliff. Much to their consternation Thorndyke does not die, and is instead able to worm-crawl his way through the forest to a river, elude them, and escape.

A friendly fellow sportsman is able to help him look more presentable and escape across the river. He eventually makes it to an English cargo ship and stows away and makes it back home. By this time only a half an hour of the film has passed. I’m not kidding. This movie d r a g s on in a way only dry British entertainment can. Hell, I would have jumped off of a cliff to make this stop before we had to endure any more. But the show must go on, I guess.

Back in England Thorndyke tries to move back into his normal routine but notices he is being followed. He comes to find out the Gestapo has followed him back to England and is trying to kill him. We are about an hour into the film. From then on it’s a series of dragged out dialogue scenes between Thorndyke, his uncle, and his peers, scenes of him running from the Gestapo via train, buying a tandem bicycle from a random couple he meets on a moor, and him finally digging a hole into a hill and hiding from the Gestapo pursuing him. Eventually the Gestapo finds him, traps him in the hole and is trying to get him to admit to what he did.

He devises a clever plan on how to fashion a rudimentary crossbow out of the things he has with him and manages to shoot the lead agent in the head with a fountain pen and kills him. The majority of the thrilling action (and I use thrilling loosely) happens in the last 15 minutes of the film. It was a welcome relief to know the monstrosity was coming to an end.

This movie viewing experience was more irritating than being number 99 at the DMV and see they’re calling number 54. I even feel like this review got out of hand, but with an hour and 42 minutes of dragged out dialogue, absolutely no action, and mediocre plot development there’s not a lot of interesting bits to use to summarize this film and write anything worthwhile. I have never read the book the film was based on, and at this point I don’t think I ever will. Do yourself a favor and don’t bother with this snoozefest. You would be better off watching grass grow, or paint dry, or running headlong into a brick wall. All of these things are infinitely better options than trying to watch this disaster.